Churchill's Humor

Today, I want to honor the statesman whose crisis leadership was perhaps the greatest of the 20th Century, and at the same time he possessed a razor whit equally as great.  Here are some of his gems, the first, as told to me, and the rest sourced from The Wit and Wisdom of Winston Churchill:

A young Winston, already known to be a strong supporter of alcohol, said to a lady,

"Madam, you are UGLY!"

"Oh, Winston," she replied, "You've been tippling again; you're quite drunk."

"Indeed, I am, Madam.  However, tomorrow, I will be SOBER!"
Churchill attended a reception and sat next to a stiff necked bishop.
A young waitress appeared with a tray of sherry glasses.  She offered one to Churchill, which he took, and then one to the bishop.  The bishop was horrified at the alcoholic offer.  He said,

"Young lady, I would rather commit adultery than take an intoxicating beverage."

Then Churchill called the girl, "Come back, lassie, I didn't know we had a choice."
"An appeaser is one who feeds the crocodile hoping it will eat him last."
"Eating my words has never given me indigestion."
"Some men change their party for the sake of their principles; others change their principles for the sake of their party."
"It would be a great reform in politics if wisdom could be made to spread as easily as folly."

The last couple are probably more serious than funny, sadly.

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